Are you in Pieces or at Peace

     All I could do was cry. Everything in my life had fallen apart and now I was sitting in a hospital talking to a counselor and doing all I could emotionally just to get through the day. She wanted me to talk and share with her all the hurt and pain I was feeling. But I was unable to do that. I explained to her that if I started to let go of even the smallest hurt I was feeling, that part of me felt like I would break into a million pieces on the floor, right in front of her. She was quick to console me by assuring me that I was in the right place to fall apart as they were equipped to put me back together. I was too scared, my heart was in a million pieces and I wasn't ready to trust anyone else with my pain. I thought to myself, I am just like the guy in the nursery rhyme, you know, Humpty Dumpty, that even though, everyone was trying, there was no one who could put be back together again.

     So instead of allowing anyone to see all those broken pieces, I proceeded to carefully tape myself back together. I told myself that I would protect myself from any further pain by keeping everything I was feeling inside, protected from the world. Little did I know that the same thing I was trying so hard to protect was the same thing I needed to let go of, and that was my heart.

     It was some time after that when I learned the hard way that taping my heart was only a temporary fix, one that would soon tear apart. The burden of carrying around all those hurts becomes very heavy and no human being can hold that weight. The Bible tells us in Matthew 11: 28-30 that Jesus said,

 

"come unto me all you who labor and are heavy laden and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light."

     I can't tell you the exact time when this Scripture became a reality to me, but it was just what I needed to hear and exactly what I needed to do. I had to take all those burdens; all those past hurts and all those shattered pieces and give them to the Lord. I had to give Him my heart and trust that He would care for it with gentleness. And so I did. Little by little, day by day I have been giving all those broken pieces to God and He has given me Peace in a way I never thought possible. I am still a work in process and He is still there for every time I go to Him with another broken piece.

     I thank God that unlike Humpty Dumpty, I have a King that is able to put me back together again. His name is Jesus and His desire if for me to be at peace both now and forever.

 

I hope that if you too have times when your life seems shattered and your heart is in a million pieces that you will bring them to God and let Him give you total peace.

(written by Pat Couchman, March 1997)




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